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Sneaker News Staff Insights: April Fools’ Edition

Sneaker News Staff Insights: April Fools’ Edition

Sneaker News Staff Insights April Fools

We here at Sneaker News consider ourselves to be pretty savvy when it comes to navigating the typical footwear hunting pitfalls, but somewhere along the way, we’ve all fallen victim to some sort of raw deal. Whether it was an honest mistake, a blatant ripoff job, or just our own stupidity, just about every member of our team has an unfortunate personal story of a sneaker deal gone bad. With today being April Fools’ Day, it seemed like the perfect fit for this week’s installment of Staff Insights to take a look back at some dark days when we played the fool while trying to make moves.

Sneaker News Staff Insights April Fools 01

JOHN KIM

I’ve been buying sneakers on the internet for more than a decade and I’m grateful to have made it this far fairly unscathed. I’ve always done my homework when it comes to background checks and seller history and whatnot, but in the earlier days of P2P buying, there really wasn’t much to go by; it was difficult to really dig deep because everyone on eBay was new and only a small handful of user feedback was all that was available. Buyer Protection was nothing more than a promise from A to B through electronic mail, and most of the time, blind trust is all one had to go buy.

So this story goes back over a decade to late 2003: I was on the hunt for some Supreme SB Dunks. At the time, I only had a very used pair of the White joints, and I could not find a pair of the black ones at a fair price. Demand for both shoes were rising every month with SBs getting really popular, and I really wanted to lock in both pairs before prices got really out of hand. The asking price for both pairs wasn’t a red flag at all; it was $600 shipped for both pairs, and considering the Supremes were going for around $350 back then, the deal seemed fair. On top of that, the seller had enough of a positive rating. All in all, there was no real cause for alarm.

The seller was prompt in keeping me updated with payment receipt, tracking info, the whole nine, and I was checking USPS package tracker like an obsessed madman on the day it was supposed to arrive. I was stoked when I saw the box sitting in my room when I got home from class; I tore the box open, saw the two orange/brown Nike boxes, whipped out the Black pair, and tried them on with the laces half-looped in. Everything appeared copacetic, but I briefly noticed that the smell of the shoes was a bit unusual; that distinct new Nike sneaker smell was missing and in its place was something a bit more pungent, a bit more “chemical-y”.

At the time, fake SB Dunks were running rampant online and some very useful guides for telling real from fake were available on Niketalk. Using those references, I did a point-by-point inspection of the shoes while comparing it with the pair I owned, and my heart sank to the bottom of my stomach as both pairs failed every part of the test. The Zoom Air bag was too thin, the font on the size tag was off, the toe-box was too high, and the top of the tongue didn’t have that signature curve like SB Dunks have. I paid $600 for two pairs of fake Supreme Dunks.

I contacted the seller immediately and the guy who once responded to every email within minutes was now impossible to reach. He would take days to respond, and would do so with one-word answers, responding to my claims of the shoes being fake with “no they’re not”. I had eBay and PayPal involved but their anti-scam division was rather elementary. After weeks of unproductive back and forth, the seller had a change of heart and decided to refund my money. I shipped the shoes back with tracking info, insurance, signature confirmation – the box was pretty much bulletproof and flame-resistant. Even after getting the shoes, the seller took forever to refund my money. I should be lucky to have my money back (although I was out $50 for shipping costs and such), and sadly I have yet to own a pair of the Black Supreme Dunks to this day.

Sneaker News Staff Insights April Fools 02

BRENDAN DUNNE

My wound is unfortunately a still-fresh one. Lately I find myself on the lookout for New Balance rarities more than anything else. The tough to find stuff in that category is just so much more mysterious than your standard sought after shoe from Nike or Jordan Brand. Go Googling for a random NB special release from a decade ago and you’re not necessarily guaranteed a background blurb on a blog telling you the story – I kinda like that.

Anyways, I’ve been lusting for some time now over the raw beauty of the M577BSL, the black and silver colorway of the New Balance 577 made for the Israeli army. For the past couple of years I always mention them in passing to anyone I know headed to Israel in hopes that they’ll put in the legwork for me for that unicorn pair. As it turns out, my dear mother told me a few weeks ago that she would be headed that way, and I knew it was my best chance at finally getting a pair. I did my best to fill her in on all the details, complete with photo evidence, and she said she would try.

Last week I got an email from her – the subject line read “Mission Accomplished”. Apparently an old Israeli guy knew the story of the shoes and assured her he could get them. He did and she bought a pair. She even sent me the photo below as evidence of her purchase.

Shoes1 570x427

MOM, THAT’S NOT THE RIGHT SNEAKER. That’s not even a black shoe! Where is the reflective N? What have you done? My mom paid this guy 790 shekels (About $280 according to her, but we know at this point that she can’t be trusted) for this random pair of 577s. Now that’s a price that I would have happily paid for the Israeli Army pair, but these joints? Nah mom. She took it well when I told her how big she had goofed and even commented “Maybe you can write a great story about the stupid shoes your mother bought for 780 Shekels [sic].”

Two takeaways from this:

A) Never trust your mom to buy sneakers for you

B) Parents just don’t understand

Let me know in the comments if you’ve got a pair of the 577BSL or if you are looking for a pair of the 577 shown – I’ll let them go for a cool $270.

Sneaker News Staff Insights April Fools 03

AARON KR.

Especially when it comes to eBay sneaker listings, most times that something looks too good to be true, it turns out to be exactly that. However, sometimes after carefully analyzing the provided info, you can convince yourself that you’ve actually stumbled onto a perfectly legit pair from some totally clueless seller unaware of the actual value of their item.

About a year or two after the 2007 retro of the Black/Metallic Silver Jordan Vs, I was browsing eBay and saw a freshly listed pair in “like new” condition with a Buy It Now of $100. Going rate for a DS pair at the time was probably about $250-300, so the red flags naturally went up, especially considering that the seller didn’t have the box. All that aside, the shoes appeared to be perfect in every which way I could think to inspect them.

After an immediate email inquiry, I had a phone conversation with a polite young woman who explained that her husband gave her the green light to sell some of his sneakers because he had so many that he never wore. He didn’t want to be bothered with the details and she didn’t really know much about them – only that “people will pay $100 for Jordans”. It all seemed like a feasible enough scenario and I felt like I had done my due diligence on it, even going as far as to request better pics of the lace locks and the bottom of the soles.

I patted myself on the back for finding this great deal and being so thorough in my investigation, and I pulled the trigger on the purchase. I was still cautiously optimistic as I waited for the Vs to arrive, but for a hundred bucks, it was worth a shot. When they showed up, I pulled them right out of the bag for a full examination, and as my fingers ran over the nubuck, I felt all my doubts slipping away.

Then about a second later, I saw that the Jumpman logos on the heels were black instead of white and it all came crashing down!  Somehow in all those photos, there were none that showed the heels, and like a dummy, I never noticed! After cursing my own amateur hour stupidity, I contacted the seller who assured me that her husband would never wear fake shoes. I replied by showing her some comparison photos and she acknowledged the discrepancies and agreed to take them back.

The thing is, these Vs were absolutely picture-perfect aside from the mis-colored Jumpman logos!  If they were fakes, they were by far the best fakes I’ve ever seen, even down to the inner label. I’ve always wondered if maybe they were some kind of factory error that wound up at a Nike outlet or something like that.

Regardless of their potential authenticity, I wasn’t interested in ever wearing Metallic Vs with blacked-out Jumpmen and I was lucky to get my money back with limited hassle. Following that , I’ve been very careful not to let bargain-hunting blinders lead to bush league eBay oversights, and I can confidently say that I haven’t been burned since.

Sneaker News Staff Insights April Fools 04

PATRICK JOHNSON

One of the most dangerous things to give an 18-19 year old kid is the lump sum of money that appears mid-semester in the form of your student loan refund check. And while it’s supposed to go to incidentals like books and meals, I of course, took a healthy percentage of that to fill up my cramped dorm room with a few new pairs. But this particular winter semester in 2011, I had my eyes set on one pair and that was the Parra x Patta Nike Air Max 1.

The shoe had released the year before and I, like many, missed out on the Amsterdam collaboration featuring the suede and nylon upper. I had been scoping a few pairs out on eBay and found a pair from an Amsterdam seller, so I assumed they were legitimate. Big mistake.

I opened the box to find one of the worst cover-up jobs imaginable. That same year, the Nike Air Max 1 had a fall release of the Monochrome series. When I peered inside the box I found a pair that didn’t match the photos online, instead I got the burgundy iteration with a slacker’s paint job on the sole in an attempt to match the Patta x Parra look that featured the sky blue and yellow. At least the seller was nice enough to throw in a set of the baby blue and white laces despite not thinking through whether I’d notice the missing tongue patches or the fact that the inner swoosh wasn’t mismatched like the actual pair.

I was lucky enough to get a good portion of the original $700 I ended up shelling out for them through PayPal after contacting eBay and the seller directly albeit impolitely, and regardless of the hassle, ended up keeping the pair and designated them as my everyday beaters. Eventually the paint wore off on the bottoms and I still have them to serve as a reminder to not jump on the bandwagon for a shoe that I can’t afford. The fact that I could’ve gotten this pair through all of the trouble for under $100 at any Urban Outfitters still stings a little.

Sneaker News Staff Insights April Fools 05

JORDAN HAGEDORN

I’ve experienced many amazing moments in my time as a sneaker lover but I’ve also experienced close to as many disappointments, or as I call them “Sneaker Fails.” Like most people, I’ve had my fair share of being pissed off after getting sniped on an intense eBay auction, missing out on my favorite sneakers and the most common disappointment: scuffing my shoes after busting out a pair that should have been kept pristine.

So, in the spirit of April Fool’s Day, the story I chose to share was based on two of my favorite sneakers of all-time, the Air Jordan XI and XII. In this case, they happened to release together in what many of us refer to as the Countdown Pack. In December of 2008, I was fortunate to order two packs for $309.99 plus tax. I stepped out of one of my best friend’s wedding reception to call and place my order. Being able to grab one of the craziest packs Jordan Brand ever dropped had me jacked! I couldn’t wait to get my hands on them.

Once they shipped, I received an email confirming they’d left the warehouse and would be to my place in 3-5 business days. So like a kid at Christmas, I’d rush home from work to see if they’d come in the mail. It should be noted that I’d previously had several other shoes delivered to my apartment without a hitch.

In this case the shoes hadn’t shown up in 3 days, 4 days or 5 days. So I waited patiently and figured they’d eventually show up. They didn’t show up in 13 days, 14 days or 15 days. At this point I had to face the harsh reality that I might not get these bad boys. The only problem was that I was out over 675 bucks as well. After a fairly frustrating and excruciating back and forth with this particular retailer, they decided to hit me with a refund. I was very grateful for their understanding and generous attitude toward me in the matter, but the mystery of the missing XI/XII pack remained.

I still think my neighbor grabbed them off my doorstep or the sneakerhead UPS man gave himself a pretty nice Christmas gift that year. (I have an outstanding offer of a $1,500 reward to information leading to the recovery of both Packs.)

The lessons here are: Always get signature confirmation on your important deliveries, don’t trust ANYONE when it comes to Air Jordans and don’t count your chickens before they hatch. To this day, every time I see the Black/Red XI and Taxi XII, I think about how foolish I was not to get signature confirmation on my order that December. It remains the worst Sneaker Fail in my time as a consumer.

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